tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-56009106481508169212012-01-27T14:58:54.871-08:00Inspirational, self awareness, health and well being, and very funny, silly stuff which I have collected over the yearsVila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.comBlogger201100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-3000581334432468382007-06-17T05:36:00.000-07:002007-06-17T05:39:23.941-07:00

From a strictly mathematical viewpoint it goes like this:What Makes 100%? What does it mean to give MORE than 100%? Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings where someone wants you to give over 100%. How about achieving 103%? What makes up 100% in life?Here's a little mathematical formula that might help you answer these questions:

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-82683999105606614452007-06-17T05:10:00.000-07:002007-06-17T05:12:06.611-07:00

At a resort on Phuket, one of the most popular attractions is (was) elephant rides.As many as eight people on one elephant, first into the surrounding forest, then down to the beach, to lunch at a fresh water lagoon, then back to the hotel. The elephants (nine) were kept chained to in-ground posts, not because they needed to be, but because it made the mothers feel better because their children

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-69380304506177699102007-06-17T05:02:00.000-07:002007-06-17T05:09:21.791-07:00

The first couple to be shown in bed together on prime time TV was Fred and Wilma Flintstone.Coca-Cola was originally green.Every day more money is printed for Monopoly than the US Treasury.The state with the highest percentage of people who walk to work:AlaskaThe percentage of Africa that is wilderness: 28%The percentage of North America that is wilderness: 38%The cost of raising a medium-size

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-64975358297844341822007-06-17T04:59:00.000-07:002007-06-17T05:20:15.121-07:00

In Shakespeare's time, mattresses were secured on bed frames by ropes. When you pulled on the ropes, the mattress tightened, making the bed firmer to sleep on. Hence the phrase "goodnight, sleep tight".It was the accepted practice in Babylon 4,000 years ago that for a month after the wedding, the bride's father would supply his son-in-law with all the mead he could drink. Mead is a honey beer and

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-60740693610394508582007-06-17T04:26:00.000-07:002007-06-17T04:34:50.742-07:00

We always hear "the rules" from the female side. Now here are the rules fromthe male side. (Please note.... these are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!)1. Learn to work the toilet seat. You're a big girl. If it's up, put it down. We need it up, you need it down. You don't hear us complaining about you leaving it down.1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.1.

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-42127688374058757352007-06-17T04:21:00.000-07:002007-06-17T04:26:45.698-07:00

MEXICAN:1. His first name was Jesus2. He was bilingual3. He was always being harassed by the authoritiesBut then there were equally good arguments.......JESUS WAS BLACK1. He called everybody "brother"2. He liked Gospel3. He couldn't get a fair trialBut then there were equally good arguments.......JESUS WAS JEWISH1. He went into His Father's business2. He lived at home until he was 333. He was

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-86388352014392787222007-05-19T01:05:00.000-07:002007-05-19T19:31:29.210-07:00

The paomnnehil pweor of the hmuan mnid.Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoetnt tihng is taht the frist and lsat ltteer be at the rghit pclae. The rset can be a total mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae thehuamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe.

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-90307063279002546502007-05-19T01:01:00.000-07:002007-05-19T01:02:17.103-07:00

This bloke walks into a public toilet where he finds two cubicles, one is already occupied. So he enters the other one, closes the door, drops his tweeds and sits down.A voice then comes from the cubicle next to him... "G'day mate, how ya goen?" Thinking this a bit strange but not wanting to be rude the guy replies... "Yeh, not too bad thanks"After a short pause, he hears the voice again... "So,

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-15099265507051821362007-05-19T00:52:00.000-07:002007-05-19T00:54:00.444-07:00

Watch your thoughts; they become words.Watch your words; they become actions.Watch your actions; they become habits.Watch your habits; they become character.Watch your character; it becomes your destiny.

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-38498586720089378882007-05-19T00:50:00.000-07:002007-05-19T19:34:38.873-07:00

The government announced today that it is changing it's emblem to a condom because it more clearly reflects the government's true political stance.A CONDOM stands up to inflation, halts production, destroys the next generation, protects a bunch of pricks and gives you a sense of security while it's actually screwing you!

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-16360411001279603582007-05-19T00:10:00.000-07:002007-05-19T00:20:57.562-07:00

Customer Service Rep: Can you install LOVE?Customer: I can do that. I'm not very technical, but I think I am ready to install now. What do I do first?CS Rep: The first step is to open your HEART. Have you located your HEART ma'am?Customer: Yes I have, but there are several programs running right now. Is it okay to install while they are running?CS Rep: What programs are running ma'am?Customer:

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-78344944099534348712007-05-19T00:07:00.000-07:002007-05-19T00:08:53.449-07:00

You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and say,"I'm fantastic in bed". - That's Direct Marketing.You're at a party with a bunch of friends and see a gorgeousgirl. One of your friends goes up to her and pointing at you says,"He's fantastic in bed". - That's Advertising.You see a gorgeous girl at a party. You go up to her and get her telephone number. The next day you call and say,"Hi

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-13440860598978778332007-05-06T07:09:00.000-07:002007-05-18T23:50:29.936-07:00

Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-88941096678312915972007-03-18T23:19:00.000-07:002007-03-18T23:21:01.636-07:00

(You MUST read them out loud)1) That's not right .......................Sum Ting Wong2) Are you harboring a fugitive?.......... Hu Yu Hai Ding3) See me ASAP.............................. Kum Hia Nao4) Stupid Man ................................ Dum Fuk5) Small Horse ................................ Tai Ni Po Ni6) Did you go to the beach? .............. Wai Yu So Tan7) I bumped into a coffee table

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-56093742888804870402007-03-18T23:00:00.000-07:002007-03-18T23:10:43.540-07:00

This is the best lawyer story of the year, decade and probably the century.A Charlotte, NC, lawyer purchased a box of very rare and expensive cigars, then insured them against fire among other things. Within a month having smoked his entire stockpile of these great cigars and without yet having made even his first premium payment on the policy, the lawyer filed claim against the insurance

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-83581520423396862402007-03-18T22:41:00.000-07:002007-03-21T21:35:40.752-07:00

1. Never give yourself a haircut after three margaritas.2. You need only two tools: WD-40 and duct tape. If it doesn't move and it should, use WD-40. If it moves and shouldn't use the duct tape.3. The five most essential words for a healthy, vital relationship are "I apologize" and "you are right."4. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.5. Never pass up an opportunity to pee.6. If he/

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-7148278256744419022007-03-18T22:32:00.000-07:002007-03-18T23:12:00.101-07:00

A time comes in your life when you finally get it...When in the midst of all your fears and insanity you stop dead in your tracks and somewhere the voice inside your head cries out - ENOUGH! Enough fighting and crying or struggling to hold on. And, like a child quieting down after a blind tantrum, your sobs begin to subside, you shudder once or twice, you blink back your tears and through a

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-56694802937917878102007-03-18T22:26:00.000-07:002007-03-18T22:29:30.968-07:00

Before I lay me down to sleep, I pray for a man, who's not a creep,One who's handsome, smart and strong,One whose willy's thick and long.One who thinks before he speaks,when promises to call, he won't wait weeks.pray that he is gainfully employed,And when I spend his cash, won't be annoyed.Pulls out my chair and opens my door,Massages my back and begs to do more.Oh, send me a man who will make

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com150tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-80060351152134270552007-03-18T21:51:00.000-07:002007-03-19T01:25:25.622-07:00

RULE 1: Life is not fair - get used to it.RULE 2: The world won't care about your self-esteem. The world will expect you to accomplish something BEFORE you feel good about yourself.RULE 3: You will NOT make 40 thousand dollars a year right out of high school. You won't be a vice president with a car phone, until you earn both.RULE 4: If you think your teacher is tough, wait till you get a

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5600910648150816921.post-4331732856478900062007-03-18T21:46:00.000-07:002007-03-18T21:47:16.556-07:00

"Never trust a dog to watch your food." -Patrick, age 10"When your dad is mad and asks you, 'Do I look stupid?' Don't answer." -Hannah, age 9"Don't pull Dad's finger when he tells you to." -Emily, age 10"When your Mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair." -Taylia, age 11"A puppy always has bad breath-even after eating a Tic-Tac."- Andrew, age 9"You can't hide a piece of broccoli in

Vila Widuchhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09446559588230841665noreply@blogger.com0